Tuesday, February 15, 2011

Busy doing nothing.

For the last several weeks I feel like I've been 'going' constantly, but when I look back, I feel like I haven't accomplished anything! I suppose this is part of the season I'm in right now with little ones at home. I can spend a whole morning doing nothing but making chocolate milk, nursing the baby, picking up toys, carrying the baby, finding requested cartoons, rescuing puzzle pieces and barbie shoes from the baby, searching for a nukey, setting up the baby gate, moving the baby gate for the big girl, resetting up the baby gate, refilling milk cups, saying no to requests for candy, fishing pieces of soggy paper out of the baby's mouth, wiping snot, changing diapers..... and then, realize it's lunchtime, my kindergartner is home, it's time to feed them, and I still haven't even gotten dressed! Most days I'm tired by noon, and have nothing to show for my exhaustion.
I think that's why I like 'projects', because I can focus my attention on one, visually satisfying task while feeling justified that there's still dirty dishes on the counter and mounds of laundry to be folded.
To be honest, I have actually accomplished things in the last couple weeks that I'm very pleased with, but sometimes I just get overwhelmed by what still needs to be done, that I'd like to just curl up and cry.
And, to wrap up the whining, I didn't intend to be a Negative Nancy.... These were just the things floating around in my head as I have been being challenged by my desire to be more intentional with my days. At church, we've been challenged to 'do the hard thing' and press in to find out what that particular thing is for us right now. And, that's one of the two things I've felt the Lord calling me to in this season - to be more intentional. And as I've been contemplating this idea, I'm having to realize that being 'intentional' isn't quite what I originally thought. My first thought was that I need to be more organized and use my time better, in turn, getting more accomplished. An overwhelming thought, yet exciting at the same time, because I desperately desire to be more organized. But as I pressed in to the father's heart on this matter, I'm realizing that being 'intentional' has very little to do with time management. It has everything to do with seizing moments. Recognizing teachable moments for my children and myself. Discovering new truths about God in my everyday tasks. Learning more about who my kids are and what their hearts look like, and how I can encourage them in who They Are, and not just what I want them to be. And, to me this is a hard thing right now. I tend to so easily get caught up in what needs to be done - homework, cleaning, laundry, etc.
But I'm praying for new ears, to hear what's on my girls' hearts, new eyes to see their giftings, and a new filter on my mouth, to encourage more and scold less. So, my 'hard thing' may not be an amazing evangelical effort, or discovering new witnessing opportunities, but in my way, it's changing the future by shaping these little women, and I pray for much grace in doing it to the best of my ability.

Tuesday, February 1, 2011

Hello February!

The last two weeks in our house have been a complete flurry of activity, mostly focused on dealing with sickness. Each of my girls took a turn with the stomach bug that was going around, one right after the other, mostly in the middle of the night. Even Joe was taken out one day by it. I thought I had tiptoes my way through it with little effect. Unfortunately, I took my turn with it at the marriage retreat weekend. And, apparently that puke fest can overload your throat with acid, triggering irritated vocal cords which results in no voice. And, lets just say that having no voice, while having 5 children, makes life a little interesting....or difficult...or gosh darn it, plain old frustrating! I whistle, clap or psst to get my kid's attention...I hope they don't feel like they're cats....
Sickness aside, we did have a fabulous time at the marriage retreat. We watched a series called, "Laugh Your Way To A Better Marriage", and boy did we laugh. It was very entertaining, but also very informative. I still feel like I'm processing. The retreat was held at this beautiful house called Creek Haven Retreat, and the house alone was enough to make me feel at rest. But Jess had put a ton of effort into making the weekend flow smoothly and be enjoyable for everyone, and we so appreciate it.
This week could prove to be rather interesting as Anna and Elley are involved with a Children's Theater production at their school and are supposed to have rehearsals every night. They're putting on 'The Tortoise and the Hare'. Joelle has a small part as part of the fan club, and Anna is one of the 4 Assistant Directors, so unless someone gets sick, she won't be on stage, but judging by the binder she brought home last night, holds a lot of responsibility! I'm not sure how things will work out in regards to the weather this week, but it will be a fun experience I'm sure. Oh, Lily did also audition for the production, but didn't get a part. She was rather disappointed initially, but has readjusted her attitude and seems happy to be home to help me with the littles. I have such good girls, and I couldn't be more proud of them all.